I am on a constant journey within myself. There are highs and there are lows and some are always worse than the others. Not matter what at the end of my journey I always conclude with “everything works itself out for me”
I am in a constant flow with the universe. I am one moving with the ocean at all times not just as one single wave but as the entire body. Even when things don’t feel so good and feel a little uncomfortable it always gets better and I always find my way to the top.
The hard part of all of this is remembering it when you’re down in the deepest depths of the ocean just terrified and digging for answers. That’s the hardest part to remember that you will come out on top like you always do. I am still searching for this way of peace
This way of peace is a complete mental game between you an all of your parts. All of your parts that fight you everyday that make you feel like you’re never good enough that every move you make is the wrong one and that you could always be doing better. Those are the parts we’re talking about. They are your inner critic and they are separate from your self.
You feel your critic come out when you want to indulge in that food or when you don’t feel up for a workout, or when your friend asks you to hangout but you never feel like going. They hound you and pester you and tell you the decision you made for yourself in wrong. This mental battle between you and your parts is exhausting and leaves you feeling anxious and as if you can never do anything right.
You know whats a little funny about out critic is they’re just scared. They are scared trauma from out past looking to protect us from getting hurt again. They’re the girl in high school that did’’t have the confidence to be herself and felt as thought she would never be good enough. She is scared. They’re the girl that blew through thousands of dollars in the blink of an eye but on what? She is scared. Shes the girl that lost herself trying to perfect life and is now attempting to pick up the pieces. She is scared.
All these parts that we feel are trying so hard to control us and make us feel terrible are just trying to protect us from the scary world out there. We have to show those parts that it’s not as scary as it may seem. That there is good that can come from learning to trust us and our decisions in this life. Life is not to be feared but it is to be enjoyed and truly lived by us and all of our parts.